I’m trying to Freaking Relax Here!

I’m so low on energy today that I decide to skip my hour-long yoga class at the gym, and decide that it would be much better to just do 10-15 minutes of yoga before I dress my kindergartener, make his lunch, and drop him off. I figure he and his little brother can join in for some lovely stretching and breathing.

I start my own little program with the “corpse” position. This is where you lie completely still on your back, arms out to the side as if you’re dead, and relax yourself deeply—feeling the heaviness of your body on the ground (and these days, it’s feeling a bit heavier than I’d prefer.) With my eyes closed, I think my 2-year-old is doing the corpse thing too until I feel his knees right in my spleen/bladder/ovary region. Not exactly inducing of relaxation. So I try downward dog. I feel something move underneath me and see his giant toothy grin, eyes wide, waiting in glee for my response. He can’t help but giggle, even though it gives him away.

I can’t get mad. In this moment, I am full of joy that he has every expectation that I’ll respond with delight in him and playfulness. And I’m a little sad that these kinds of moments—his toddlerhood is slipping away so quickly. I’m not saying that I won’t be glad to be left to do my yoga in peace next year when all 3 of my boys will be in school. And I’m not saying that I always delight in these interferences with what I want to do. But in this moment, I just enjoy life—and that’s pretty peaceful.